First, to answer the burning question from the comments to my last post: Why, if having two of my children in public school is causing me to have heart palpitations, do we have them there in the first place? Well, the short answer is that I had to go back to taking in daycare children. The high gas prices and the rising grocery bills were making things VERY difficult around here, and while I had complete confidence in my ability to homeschool multiple children while simutaneously taking care of several active toddlers (I am SO lying right now. Pardon me while I repent. Okay, I'm back.) I began to notice that the parents of those active toddlers? Did not seem to think that I could do the job. Every time I had an interview things would go great until I mentioned that I homeschooled, and then I would watch the light fade from their eyes and they would make a hasty retreat. So we prayed. And prayed some more. And then made the choice that for right now, until we can get past the financial situation that we were in, we would put Grace and Alex in school while they were still at the elementary level and there was less possibility of them being lured into a life of crime and cronic facebook addiction. I'm hoping to bring them back home again next year. If I survive this one.
And speaking of Grace and Alex's school, they had their annual fall festival Friday night and I was viciously attacked by a huge inflatable castle. It actually deflated twice, both times with my three youngest children inside, but the second time it deflated right on top of my head. Apparently, it kept coming unplugged, but I think that explanation is very fishy. Once is an accident, but twice? It just cannot be a coincidence. I think that someone was trying to do us in, or at the very least cause us to have an ongoing fear of inflatable bouncy things. And while the castle was making it rapid descent on top of my head and the heads of three of our precious offspring, do you think that my husband tried to help us? No. He just stood there and held the kids shoes. I was appalled at his lack of heroism. You would think that he was rendered helpless by laughter or something.
That's okay, though. I will get him back. The next time he lies down on the floor and the children attack him like they are crazed lions attacking a poor, defenseless caribou ( Do lions attack caribou? What exactly is a caribou? Did I just make that up? Sudenly, it sounds weird. Caribou! Probably, I'm spelling it wrong. Cariboo? Karibough?) I will not help him. I will let him lie there and be pummelled because they are convinced he is a jungle gym. And then maybe I will go get a deflated plastic swimming pool and throw it on his head. You know...just so he will be more sympathetic next time.
Oh dear. Revenge is wrong, isn't it? Sigh. Okay. Y'all just go read someone else's blog while I go repent. I'm getting really good at it.
(Tyler, Texas) — This morning, Fox News Opinion published my latest op-ed on how to defeat the Islamic State and protect the American people and our allies...
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